Folks we have a MAJOR crisis on our hands! Something SO serious it makes Global warming,Tsunamis in Asia, the Taliban and Occupy Wall Street look like a sunny day at the beach….but folks THIS time we are in dire catastrophe mode……….
Alas, we are in the midst of a BUTTER SHORTAGE!!
Lordy Lordy, what will we do upon the eve of holiday cookie season? What will we replace in our lard laden recipes for Santa?
It’s a travesty that is upon us and we must do something before this leads to more devastation on our hands such as no WHIPPED CREAM for our ice cream or HALF and HALF for our lattes!!!
Norway is blaming this shortage on the low carb diet phase. Leave it to them to hold accountable a dietary scape goat that made so many diet gurus famous!!
I suppose we can point the finger at the late Dr. Atkins -God bless his soul- for making the world believe they should eat heavily cream and butter laden foods and cut out the carbs…..now look what you’ve done Dr. A.!!! ….the world is getting fatter and fatter and now restaurants have NOTHING to serve in their bread baskets while we mull over our menus anticipating what we will order for dinner!!!
The shame of it all!
You know what this REALLY means to us don’t you folks??……It means we are ALL going to have NO choice but to go back to HIGH CARB LOW FAT diets like we did back in the 90’s when My friends and I would go out partying until the wee hours of the night/morning existing on nothing but sugar and alcohol then go straight to the diner for a huge breakfast of bagels (no butter!) and pancakes (no butter!) Good times!!
Looking back, I suppose it wasn’t such a bad lifestyle – No responsibilities or worries and I was at my all time thinnest and lowest weight (ah- to be 19!!)
But I suppose the WORST part about this entire debacle is that The Rednecks will no longer be able to host their butter eating contests ..and may have to resort to replacing them with bobbing for apples?…..