Leave the Freshness for Summer’s Eve……

After two weeks of Spring Break with kids and family home all day – I woke up yesterday morning to a quiet and empty house and felt …..a little lonely.

When you work from home you become accustomed to a quiet and serene environment. I can go an entire day without uttering a word while I am focused on work.

I always have some sort of companionship though between the landscapers and the pool guy. (Although everyone else on the block’s pool guy seems to look like Ricky Martin and – my luck- mine looks like he just escaped from a nursing home).

Nevertheless, yesterday seemed just a little TOO quiet so I turned the TV on for background noise and there happened to be a talk show with Doctors – I am still not sure what show it was – nor did I recognize anyone on the panel who was the host – but I enjoyed what they had to say……for instance, they taught me that if you flush with the toilet seat up the fecal matter spreads all over the bathroom causing all kinds of E- Coli possibilities……hmmmm INTRIGUING!

Lesson Learned:

Put the toilet seat down before flushing. (Hint to all the men out there- put it down anyway- your ladies will appreciate it in the middle of the night when they get up to pee and don’t need to go for an ass X – Ray)

And another really interesting bit of research was:

There is a certain percentage of rodent hair and insect fecal matter that is allowed by the FDA in food products such as CHOCOLATE and PEANUT BUTTER. (It was as if they actually saw EXACTLY what I inhaled last night and needed an excuse to stop me from my self destructive behavior!)

In chocolate the Average is 60 or more insect fragments per 100 grams (and by fragment they mean poop) and an average of at least one or more rodent hairs per 100 grams .

In peanut butter (the jar kind not the natural crushed peanuts you get from Whole Foods straight from the peanut grinder although I wonder what happens if an insect just crawled in – I suppose no one is there stopping it- but that wouldn’t be fragments it would just be the entire bug which would then be called the CRUNCHY peanut butter) there is an average of 30 or more insect fragments and one or more rodent hairs per 100 grams.

Don’t worry- none of this information will stop me from eating my favorite nosh.

In any case, it made me stop and think about the ingredients that go into our foods- that were PURPOSELY placed there while manufacturing them.

I have already stepped up on my soap box prior to Passover to preach about the benefits of eating clean and avoiding the tapioca starch and the potato paste that are the major ingredients in the Passover fare (even though it didn’t stop me from bingeing on my chocolate macaroons)…..but now I am referring to just chemical ingredients such as those found in cereals labeled as  “Healthy All Natural” like Kellogg’s Raisin Bran Crunch which give the impression of being a “HEALTHY” breakfast. (It used to be my friend’s go to healthy start to her day until her friend pointed out that it has just as much sugar per serving as Fruit Loops so now she does what  any wise woman would do and just eats fruit loops).

With ingredients such as glycerin, molasses and modified corn starch …what exactly is HEALTHY about that?

Some products add TOCOPHEROLS which apparently are for “Freshness” (sounds like a commercial for Douche back in the 70’s).


I suppose the point I am ALWAYS trying to make is this:

If you choose to enjoy junk food – and LORD KNOWS I DO – then do just that …..I love my peanut butter and chocolate with or without rat crap.


And if you THINK you are eating “healthy” like the “All natural whole grain” cereals, just know that the added list of 102 chemicals that seem to go into making it – just don’t add up to a sensible start of the day .

Opt for oatmeal and berries or Greek yogurt and almonds with flax seed.

Another go to breakfast favorite of mine which boasts protein as well as fiber is Quinoa with egg whites and cinnamon blended into a pancake batter and topped with truvia or almond butter- seriously that was my go to breakfast all Passover! so yummy.

Send me your favorite breakfast ideas – I am running a contest.

And now for your entertainment pleasure:

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