Life is GOOD As long as your underwear is CLEAN……

When I was a kid, my mother used to tell me that I ALWAYS had to wear clean underwear – JUST IN CASE OF EMERGENCY.

(god forbid the paramedics would have to see dirty underwear amongst the blood and guts they have to deal with.)

To this day I think about that – even when I put on my sexy thongs ( I know what you’re thinking – that is just so messed up… Please! – just file it among the gazillion other issues to discuss with the therapist when I finally make the time to see one and put him in early retirement).

Well, her advice was pretty sound the other day when she was taken in an ambulance in her BATHING SUIT after  she tripped by her pool and broke her femur which landed her in the hospital and then rehab for the next 8-12 weeks.

(ha! jokes on you mom- clean underwear in an ambulance isn’t something you can PLAN now is it???)

So while visiting her yesterday (seriously…. i am spending WAY too much time in the hospital these days- I realized I am getting too accustomed to the smell of formaldehyde and disinfectant when I walked through Bloomingdales and gagged at the perfume ladies) I noticed her roommate had 2 black eyes and unbelievably swollen limbs covered in a head to toe cast like the kind you see only in cartoons.

Now I am no YENTA – not because I am such a GOOD person but rather because I simply do NOT CARE.

However, her wincing and whining left me with no choice but to ask my mom what the hell happened to the woman in the bed behind the curtain next to her….to which my mom replied:

“A HUMMER hit her”

I said: “You mean a HUMMER hit her CAR?”

She said: “ NO, a HUMMER hit HER.”


What does one possibly say back to that??

Lesson Learned:

Appreciate the small things you CAN do….like the ability to BREATHE.

Take this weekend to ENJOY the LITTLE things in your life….like the fact that you DID NOT get hit by a HUMMER.

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