So I’m back…..
I can’t even tell you how many blogs I’ve written (in my head), yet haven’t taken the time to actually sit down with a glass of wine (- OK, THAT part I still do -) and POST them.
I suppose there are a few reasons for that…..
Initially it was because I was cramming for my Securities Law exam and anything relating to sitting in front of a computer was spent on simulated practice exams.
Writing caustic life lessons seemed, well, ….creatively self INDULGENT.
I couldn’t even justify scrolling thorough and mocking Facebook let alone WRITING about nonsense (and by “nonsense” I am referring to the craziness that goes on in my head on a daily basis that for some reason i enjoy sharing with the world – somewhat in denial thinking that perhaps they actually CARE).
So I took some time off from writing to focus on my studies and simultaneously WORK got busier and before I knew it so much time had elapsed that it became almost
“A THING” that I wasn’t writing anymore.
You have to be careful when you let circumstances turn from the point of being diminutive into something as colossal as “A THING” because before you know it- that THING spirals into something so whopping that it becomes unstoppable.
You know what I’m talking about….like when you open a bag of chips and eat a few then immediately frustrated – – close the bag up while muttering something under your breath about not eating anymore – but a few minutes later sure enough you open that bag and take just a few more, again all while mumbling to yourself that you’re going to stop after this last one. Then you take a few more…..Until you’ve finished the entire bag.
Kind of like that.
Soon enough so much time had elapsed in between posts that I put so much pressure on myself that when I finally DID decide to sit down and write I needed to produce something GREAT. Yet came up empty. Bag of chips empty.
After all, despite the 10000’s of blogs I write in my head on a daily basis ( seriously there is so much material in South Florida I can’t even go into Walgreens without an incident with George Costanza’s parents cursing me out for something) I couldn’t just DEBUT my leave of absence with just ANY subject matter…that would surely disappoint all. (And by “ALL” she means herself).
So the pressure built and then the idea of having waited so long for a comeback just seemed to create even more MYSTERY and ANXIETY.
I suppose it was kind of like my FIRST KISS – WAY back when.
I went through all 4 years of high school without so much as bumping into a boy and put so much pressure on myself to have my FIRST KISS be with someone “SPECIAL” – an image that came straight out of “Sixteen Candles” where Jake was supposed to show up at my door on my birthday. After all, isn’t that what happened to ALL normal teenagers ?
But growing up attending Orthodox schools pretty much restricted anything NORMAL from occurring ( My teenage years was more like Anthony Michael Hall ‘s instead)
wasn’t until college when I allowed nature to take its course and FINALLY take that FIRST KISS……and to this day …………………
I DON’T EVEN REMEMBER it.
So I decided to just take the pressure off myself from making this premiere blog a winner and instead just put it out there to BREAK the ice.
Kind of like jumping into a cold pool head first -sometimes in life you have to just take the plunge and not think so much about it. Once you’re in you start to warm up and the rest just happens.
I can’t guarantee that the quality will get better but at least they will be more consistent.
Stay Tuned. And now for your viewing pleasure……